10 Things I Learned This Year
10 Things I Learned This Year
1. Being present is the biggest gift I can give to myself and those I love.
The gift of presence is that we can sit with "what is" and connect with the natural flow of life. Presence takes work. I know that, for me, when I can tell someone is present with me, maybe they offer a genuine listening ear or even just space to be me, I feel so loved!! I want to continue to be present with myself and if I could do one thing very well for the rest of my life...I would be fully present with my loved ones :)
2. Healing doesn't have to happen overnight!
I like to get to the heart of things quickly. Often I am courageous enough to get to the bottom of a negative emotion. This is helpful, but it doesn't mean the pain goes away. I've learned that it is OK to take time with myself.
3. I am in charge of prioritizing my own well-being.
This is what it is! It's on me to care for my physical health. It's on me to create a sustainable workout routine. It's on me to eat in a way that feels good for my body. It's also on me to make discerning decisions on what to say and to whom. It is okay to remove myself from situations or conversations where I don't feel safe or understood. It's on me to place the energy and focus back on myself. It's on me to take care of myself!
4. Meditation works!
I am grateful that I've remained consistent with my mindfulness practices, such as meditation, journaling, walking, yoga, and cooking. These practices really work - especially meditation. Consistently sitting with myself is huge. It brings me back to center and connects me with what I'm feeling so that I can integrate new lessons.
5. People have the right to make their own choices. Let them.
This is true. I recognize that I've set a lot of expectations on myself to make "good" choices and to do what is "right," and therefore, I've placed this same expectation on others. The truth is that everyone is on their own path and people will make the choices that make sense to them. What has been helpful for me in accepting this truth is that I have the right to make my own choices as well.
6. It's okay if people don't like me.
Ugh, true. If people don't like me or the way I am responding to something that has happened, it is okay! It's actually quite a bit unrealistic to think everybody should like me or agree with me. It's okay if they don't, and in my opinion, it usually is not personal, even though it may feel like it.
7. I'm allowed to feel disappointed by people.
I'm allowed to feel disappointed or confused by the actions of other people. Again, this is their journey and not mine. As I just mentioned, the reality is that it is typically not personal. An exercise I have found to be fruitful asking myself why I am feeling disappointed by someone and what is the underlying feeling that is driving that disappointment. Is there a limiting belief I carry that leads to this disappointment?
8. It's okay to ask for help.
I can be stubborn! I realize this. I know I will continue to need help in my life in ALL sorts of areas. It is beautiful to be vulnerable.
9. It never hurts to take pause before responding.
This is a truth that I continue to re-learn. I am proud that I often pause before responding or reacting. I recognize that even longer and deeper pauses might be necessary when the reaction toward something feelings strong. I recognize it is still important to share the truth about how I feel, but with a brave pause, the truth can be shared in a gentle and powerful way. Grace is here.
10. I am not perfect!
Thank GOODNESS!!!! I have parts of myself that I really love, and other parts that need quite a bit of compassion. I can strive to be my best, but my best isn't perfect. Because what is perfection really? Perfection for me has been figuring out what is valid and good in the eyes of others, and embodying that. Why would I allow others to validate me if they don't fully know me? I have learned to give myself the grace of feeling negative emotions and knowing that this is normal.
